It’s not worth crying over spilt milk…or is it?!

Before our little Rosie was even conceived I had plans of breastfeeding. I had heard horror stories of mastitis and thrush, and well…you name it. Regardless of all those stories (which did worry me), I held strong to my desire. Sassy was a formula baby, and turned out fine..healthy as a horse. I was young, working, and in school with a full load of classes so I didn’t give breastfeeding her the first thought. With Rosie it was all just the opposite. I had great plans of breastfeeding, ordered the best pump, bought all the milk storage bags, and nursing gear you could ever imagine needing. I was ready! WRONG!!! I never could have imagined all the issues I would face in breastfeeding. My baby is three months old and I’m lucky to be able to get her a bottle a day pumping. My supply took a hard hit months ago and I’ve struggled building it back since. One night I had just finished pumping before bed and accidentally knocked over the bottle of milk. My husband giggled and I just looked up in tears. It was funny, but when you struggle to produce so little, it’s also really sad. He quickly helped me clean up and assured me that I was doing great and any breast milk is better than none. So I’m here to tell you ladies that if you ever struggle with breastfeeding, you are not alone. You rock! It’s ok to cry over that spilt milk, heck it’s like liquid gold really! Keep up the good work and if/when you choose to stop breastfeeding/pumping it’s ok; you are an amazing mother. And if never opt to breastfeeding a single child, you are an amazing mother. Your worth is not found in how you choose to feed your baby.


Adoption Orientation

Yesterday we had our adoption orientation with a potential agency in Shreveport, Louisiana.  Coach and I were very excited/nervous/anxious about our meeting because for us, this was the first step in the direction we’ve felt led to go for a very long time.  And let’s face it…we had NO CLUE what to expect!  So, Coach and I left around 9:30 that morning, after Sassy headed off to her Granny’s house.  I didn’t want to just sleep on the ride up there, so I had been saving up some magazines that a sweet friend had been passing on to me.  As we drove I began reading through those magazines one-by-one.  The first one took up a lot of my reading time because it had a lot of good articles!  As I came to the end of the magazine, I saw an article titled: Easing Your Family’s Concerns: When Grandma and Grandpa Don’t Share Your Vision For Adoption.  My jaw dropped and I immediately looked up from my magazine.  In my mind I was thanking God, because he knew I need this article.  “Wow!”, I stated.  I turned and looked at my husband.  He was wondering what in the world I was so shell shocked over.  I couldn’t even speak, but lifted the magazine up, showing it to him.  Obviously he is still driving at this point and I finally realize I should get myself together at this point and read it to him.  So, I read him the title of the article.  He looked at me amazed and said, “Well, get to reading it!”.  God love that man!  The family’s story was slightly different than ours of course, but the principles were the same as what we were dealing with.  See, most of our family has responded wonderfully to our news about digging deeper into the adoption world….MOST of them.  Of course, as we expected, certain grandparents didn’t respond so well.  We weren’t surprised, but we left wishing they could understand.  They didn’t meet the news with complete dissatisfaction, but they also weren’t supportive in their comments.  Basically we were told that we are young and need to slow down, getting too anxious to grow our family, and that maybe we only need one child.  It is so hard to help people understand the desire to have more children, but I find it even harder to help the understand the deep desire to follow God’s calling.  Yes, we struggle with fertility, but it is not impossible for us to have more children the old fashioned way.  But we believe God builds families in all sorts of ways; and how could adoption (or even fostering) ever NOT be God’s desire for his followers.  Maybe His timing is different than a family’s desire for it, but God clearly calls us to care for the orphans.  So, needless to say, those words were really bothering me over the last week.  That article was exactly what I needed.  It provided me assurance and advice on how to handle those responses.  Isn’t God amazing!  I could have easily picked up that magazine to read over a week ago when it was given to me, but I didn’t.  Or maybe I could have not gotten to it on this trip and read it on a later date.  But I didn’t!  God gave me that article exactly how and when he knew I would need it.
Once we arrived in Shreveport we went to the boardwalk to just walk around and take in the sights a bit.  Of course I had to stop in The Chocolate Crocodile for a treat.  Coach got me a mint chocolate covered oreo and a milk chocolate covered strawberry.  Needless to say, they were both AMAZING!!!  We were at the boardwalk for about an hour before it was time to head to our appointment.  On the way to the office I became very nervous!  I looked over and asked Coach if he was nervous.  He said, “No.  Why?  Are you nervous?”  I was kind of surprised he wasn’t nervous, but I told him that I was nervous.  I told him I get nervous when I go to the doctor’s office, though.  It only took us about twelve minutes to get the agency’s office.  As we got out of the car I prayed for God’s guidance, assurance, and peace.  As we opened the door to the office, all of my worries vanished and I didn’t feel nervous anymore.
The office there is beautiful and very comfortable, which I found very reassuring.  We were greeted and waited on the couch in the front as they prepared for us.  Once they were ready, we were taken to their office down the hall and were introduced to the director.  We met with her and the lady she works with, who handles most of the their homestudy work.  They were very welcoming and immediately made us feel comfortable.  They jumped right in and started at the beginning with some general information on adoption and laws here in Louisiana.  Of course I already knew most of that with all the research I had done, but it was nice to have the information confirmed through a professional.  Of course I went prepared with a list of questions and a notebook to write everything down.  I’m a list maker for sure!  As she talked I had my pen moving as fast as I could move it.  Once she got into the specifics of their agency, I was able to ask the questions that we had as we went through everything.  They answered all of our questions and more.  They were so easy to talk to!  Of course Coach mostly just sat back and listened, taking everything in, while I was right there in the middle of it all asking a million questions.  When we left the office, we left satisfied and excited about what the future holds.  We left with answers that made us smile.  We left knowing that these were good people, who really cared about all the parties involved in adoption.  The ladies were very honest with us about all the options in terms of adopting a baby, and how they only work with so many couples at a time so that people are not waiting for three plus years to adopt a baby.  They really encouraged us to spread the word around town that we want to adopt, as many couples end up adopting that way.  We left very happy.  This agency is definitely on the top of our list.  I can not tell you how nice it was to actually be able to go and meet with the agency, rather than simply correspond through email, text and phone calls, as all the others have been.
So, I’m sure you’re thinking, “Okay, now what then??”.  Well, so were we when we left.  As for now, we are planning, making a game plan.  I think we have decided that for now we will do a lot of praying and a lot of saving.  We hope to start doing some type of fundraising soon to start raising the money to fund an adoption.  We also plan to start spreading the word locally that we want to adopt.  Once we find a new home to purchase we plan to really get active in pursuing adoption.  We will then apply with an agency if we don’t already have a little to adopt by that point, and take on fundraising full force.  So, yes, we are going to adopt!  We also discussed the possibility of pregnancy occurring during all of this.  Should that happen, we would welcome it (of course) and still move forward with adoption plans.  For us, this is not just about having more kids, it’s about the will of God and his perfect love. 
Adoption is not cheap, and this is something we are doing on faith alone.  We are trusting that God will fully provide the funds for us to adopt a precious life.  That means that we will be doing a lot of fundraising!  I can tell you now that when that time comes, any and all help/advice/suggestions are greatly welcomed.  If you have fundraising ideas for us, please do share, as we are already working on a list.
What to praying for:
  • Please pray that God do a work in our hearts, and our family’s heart in preparation for adoption.
  • Please pray that God will lead us in the direction he desires and that we will recognize that.

  • Please pray that God will open the door for us to find our next home over the next few months so that we can comfortably move forward.  (Yes, we have the room now to take in a child, but we would like to be in a more settled/permanent place since we are planning on moving within the next 6 months.
  • Please pray that God will provide the way to bring a child into our lives.
Thank you so very much for all the prayers, good thoughts, and support.  It means the world to us!  We have the most amazing friends and family!  We are truly blessed!